Saying Goodbye to the Live Study with Me Sessions
Hey loves!
Today marked the last day of my live study with me sessions on my YouTube channel. It is sad to write this, but I am so grateful that I got to do these sessions and have so many of you guys join in. You probably have no idea how much you have helped me by joining the sessions - you have kept me accountable and made me feel like we’re one big study group. And your comments about how the sessions helped you mean so much to me!
My exchange university’s exam season will start next week and I think now is a good time to say goodbye to the live study with me sessions. I guess I will have in-person classes in the coming academic year and so I will probably go back to studying in the library instead of streaming live study with me sessions from my desk at home. This was a pandemic project which I never expected to become such a big part of my life. My first stream was on March 24th, 2020 and I’ve done well above 100 streams since. My study with me playlist now has over 180 videos and it shows how much effort has gone into this pandemic project.
These streams were something that helped me a lot when it comes to studying, but I am also looking forward to studying without a camera again. On the one hand, it is great to know that you are not studying alone. But constantly being on camera is also exhausting - you worry about little things (which, in all honesty, probably no one notices); like whether your hair looks ok; whether your drinking sounds weird and so on. And having a schedule filled with streams has also made it hard to schedule stuff around it - when you have just your own study schedule, you can easily switch times around. But when you have made a promise to many people to show up at that time, it is not that easy.
Doing these live streams also taught me quite a few things: I had to learn to let go of my perfectionism - when you are live, you cannot do a retake if something went wrong in the first take, you just have to run with it. My WiFi has also screwed me over more than once, but you learn to say, ‘well, tomorrow will be a better day’. There has also been a bad side to doing the streams: I have had issues with objectifying and sexualising comments more than once, some of which were so extreme that I reported them to the police. I’ve grown a thick skin over time and if any of the creeps who wrote that disgusting stuff are reading this: karma has its eyes on you. Something like this should not be part of the streaming experience for anyone and is absolutely unacceptable.
But despite some negative aspects, this has been an overall positive experience. One which I am very grateful for and which has definitely made my pandemic experience special. Thank you for showing up for so many early-morning study with me sessions, for bearing with me even when my WiFi decided that it was not in the mood for a stream, for being so supportive in the comments, and just for being my study buddies.
And if you are in need of a new study buddy, join my Discord server where you can study together with other students in the study rooms - there is usually always someone around studying in one of the rooms. Just join and you can turn your camera on or leave it off (whatever you prefer). The server has become a really supportive environment and I hope you will like it!
Lots of Love,
Elena
